5 on Friday

--ONE--

Hooray, the last day of January is HERE!!! January is the worst, isn't it? I feel such a sense of relief when February 1st arrives. I'm usually so surprised at how fast time passes when a month is over, but not with January. That being said, I will be really sad if we don't get just a little bit more snow. It turns out I appreciate the seasons more than I thought I did.

--TWO--

Todd won a couple awards recently that are very exciting -- Squadron Field Grade Officer of the Year and Operations Group Field Grade Officer of the Year. I am SO PROUD of him I can't stand it! He is now competing for FGO of the Year at the wing level. We find out in one week who won at the Annual Awards Ceremony and I am so excited and anxious all at the same time! It's a formal event and I can't wait for a night on the town to celebrate his accomplishments!

--THREE--

I spotted this glow axe at Wal-Mart this week. What in the world? Necklaces, bracelets, rings, sunglasses...and an axe???

--FOUR--

I watch a lot of reality TV. A LOT. The newest show I'm obsessed with -- Wahlburgers.



Let me state for the record that Joey was always my favorite New Kid. Donnie was a little old and raunchy for young and impressionable me. I like him better as an actor -- did you see Band of Brothers? He was almost unrecognizable. However, I am completely fascinated by the Wahlberg family, especially Mark. That guy is so disciplined it's crazy. The way he has turned his life around from a teen gangsta (for real), to Marky Mark, to a legit actor and producer with a wife and family amazes me. Dear Marky Mark -- please write a book because I would read it immediately.

--FIVE--


Photo courtesy abc.go.com

I'm a little late to the game on this one, but another new show obsession is Shark Tank. I went to go visit some family in Utah a couple weeks ago and my SIL and BIL are hooked on this. Thanks to them, now we are too. It inspires me to start a business until I remember that I don't have any original ideas of my own.

Moms at War?

About every month some new article about the Mommy Wars goes viral. The latest installment started circulating social media last week, and with every share and repost that appeared in my Facebook feed, I became more and more passionate. Not necessarily about the article -- I mean, it was fine and I applaud their effort to encourage moms to support each other. But I am becoming more and more convinced that most anti-mompetition articles seem to miss the point entirely.

Most of these kinds of articles just tell me how judgmental my friends are of me and how judgmental I am of them. They tell me we're all insecure and that we shouldn't feel that way. They think the problem is solved by simply saying "Stop judging! We're all in this together!" I don't think so.

Yes, we judge from a place of insecurity, but you can't just tell a person to stop being insecure. Why are we insecure? Let's get to the root of that.

We judge because we're insecure, and we're insecure because motherhood is the most thankless job on the planet. My daughter isn't going to tell me my diaper-changing technique is flawless, or that her eggs were scrambled to her liking this morning. So we seek validation from other places.

What's the ultimate validation? We've been told imitation is the sincerest form of flattery. If I convince my friends to mother the way I do, then obviously they think I'm a great mom, right? Imitation is definitely flattering, but we're looking for the wrong kind of validation. We'll never truly stop comparing and judging until we are satisfied with ourselves.

Easier said than done, right?!? Ha! So how do we become secure with ourselves and our parenting abilities? How do we reach the point where we don't take offense when our friend makes a different choice than we would have made?

Honestly, I think a lot of it comes from maturity and humility. The two go hand in hand -- I think the most mature people are the ones who are the most humble. My religion gives me knowledge and perspective that I value. I know we were created in God's image and that he gave each of us our own abilities and temptations.

We're all different for a reason. I have different strengths and priorities, I handle problems differently, I have a different energy level, etc., and the way all of that stuff comes together makes me different from everybody else. Our goal on this earth is to magnify our talents and overcome our weaknesses in positive and pleasing ways. We must humble ourselves and pray to recognize and accept what makes us different before we can move forward. And then we can pray for confirmation that what we're doing is right for us.

Seriously though, this kind of mastery and acceptance is definitely not going to happen over night, which is why we've been given a lifetime to accomplish it. And don't get me wrong -- I don't think we shouldn't learn from others. There are people in our lives with experience and guidance we should definitely value. But in the end, we have to be secure in our decisions, humble enough not to impose our will on others, and mature enough not to give a flip what others think.  Why don't these Mommy Wars articles talk about how to accomplish that?

A Tea Party with Clarity

Scarlett is obsessed with tea parties right now. OBSESSED. We pretend to drink air and eat plastic cake all day long around here. And of course she knew Clarity the cat would enjoy partaking as well.

First she brought Clarity her cup and saucer.

She correctly surmised that Clarity would enjoy her cat food more than plastic cake, so she scooped some out of her bowl to serve on a pink saucer.

Clarity wasn't eating as quickly as Scarlett would have liked, so she found it necessary to feed her out of her hand. Clarity actually ate a bite, which shocked me. 

Clarity is generally annoyed by Scarlett, but more than anything she's also pretty lazy. I'm starting to think she masterminded this whole plan to get somebody to feed her without having to get off the couch, and she knew Scarlett would do anything to win her love. It's a win-win for both of them!

My Holiday Summary

I would love to jump into the New Year with warm and fuzzy holiday updates, Mocktail Monday, and rants about Congress cutting military retirees' COLA raises. And I thought I just might do that. But I can't ignore the biggest event of our holiday season this year -- my father passing away after an almost 2 year battle with skin cancer on December 27, 2013.

He went into the hospital the week of Thanksgiving and never came home, so the month of December was stressful and one big blur. His obituary ran in the Norman Transcript and Tulsa World, and you can read it here if you wish. He was a very smart man (I recently found his standardized test scores from his junior year of high school -- 97th percentile!) and achieved great success in many endeavors during his life. I love him and miss him every day, and I am very thankful for the friends and family who have comforted me during this time.